At least I’m getting paid for this.
Those were my thoughts as I went through having sex with Guy #29, #30 and #31.
Thinking about money doesn’t make for great sex. I don’t think it made for a good movie either.
One day, in the summer of 2009, I shot three porn scenes in a hotel room in Toronto’s gay district.
Having sex three times a day is a lot of work.
Guy #29, my first colleague of the day, was by far the cutest. Our story was an inspiring one: The two of us had supposedly met in the lobby of our hotel and went from eying each other to having oral sex in a hotel room.
The sex with Guy #29 was actually fun. Both of us were enjoying it, despite the fact there were three guys filming us.
The thing is, those three guys wanted an hour of material. That meant I had to postpone the part people often fast forward to when watching porn, the money shot as it’s called.
Going a full hour of constant receptive oral sex without any money shooting requires a lot of concentration. I literally had to think of unsexy thoughts to prevent myself from climaxing.
When I finally was allowed to, I knew the hardest part of my day was over.
That was true in the sense that Guy #30, who I had to perform oral duties on half an hour later, was anything but hard. I suspected him of being a straight guy looking for a way to make money. He must have figured there are worse things than receiving oral sex for an hour.
I got the feeling he resented me. Or maybe he resented himself for doing gay porn and that sentiment echoed into his sexuality.
It was difficult acting excited when we both clearly weren’t. God knows what we were thinking back in the lobby, where we had supposedly met each other.
Going a full hour of having sex with someone who radiates nothing but resentment is nothing short of torture, even more so when it’s being filmed.
The only time Guy #30 and I felt the same was at the end, when we were both happy it was over.
Guy #31 entered the hotel room just as Guy #30 was leaving.
Guy #31 was by far the least attractive of the three. He was also the sweetest. I could tell he considered himself lucky he had supposedly met me in the lobby. With two money shots already on my score board it was very easy to postpone this one for as long as I needed it to.
Added to that, Guy #31 was good at his job.
I think it’s funny I ended up having the better sex with the one I deemed least attractive.
Still, doing porn is hard work. I was happy to have experienced it, but I was probably happier it would always be an adventure, never a career.
There’s just too many unsexy thoughts going on when you’re doing porn.
LENGTH: 3 x 1 hour
SEX SCORE GUY #29 (0 = Thinking of Kim Jong-un during sex <–> 10 = The best sex ever): 7.5
SEX SCORE GUY #30 (0 = Picturing Kim Jong-un doing a lap dance <–> 10 = The best sex ever): 2
SEX SCORE GUY #31 (0 = ‘Kim Jong-un, is that a box of Pringles in your pants or are you happy to see me?’ <–> 10 = The best sex ever): 8