A lot of Guys take offense to people that write about certain preferences on their dating profiles:
Not into Asians
Looking for black cock
Latinos move to the front of the line
I never got why any of this is offensive.
Personally, I don’t have much sexual experience with black Guys. Truth be told I’ve never felt much sexual chemistry between me and ebony. Whether the preference on my end is conditioned or innate I don’t know, although being as white privilege as they come it’s not unlikely my lack of sexual interest in black Guys is at least partly because of my inherent racism.
Which is exactly the reason why I would never share my racial preferences on my dating profile.
I actually had a very nice date with a black Guy once.
Guy #51 was a lawyer. I asked him questions about how to get away with murder. It wasn’t really the kind of law he specialized in, but he went along in pondering various crime scenarios with me.
The reason I ended up at Guy #51’s house was simple. I had set myself on a mission.
It was my mission to have sex with a black Guy at least once, which I suppose is the gay scene equivalent of me bragging about having this one black friend.
It took me all but an hour to hook up with the first cute black Guy I found online.
The sex was interesting.
My personal experiences taught me Asians tend to have smaller genitalia. Guy #51 confirmed another stereotype for me. There’s size and then there’s size. There’s penis and then there’s Cape Canaveral.
Impressed as I was, I didn’t really know how to handle it. Having done so many Asians I felt like a hairdresser whose comb had just been replaced by a brush cutter. I was impressed, but equally inept.
I very much enjoyed being with Guy #51, but mostly because he was the kind of lawyer that would help a stranger get away with murder. Sexually though, he wasn’t really the Guy from his pictures. He was a little fat and a tad too hairy, which I felt bad about, because I really wanted to be attracted to Guy #51. It would be key to proving I wasn’t in any way racist.
Things were very cuddly for a sex date. It’s the best I could do. It was nice being intimate with Guy #51, but it never quite turned me on, I suppose because I was consistently reminding myself I was being intimate with a black Guy, showing the world how much of a racist I wasn’t.
Not the kind of thought process to expedite any arousal.
So many of our preferences are variables we have so little control over: cuteness, eye color, hair color, body type, dick size. I always live under the assumption I know my preferences, yet I often find myself surprised by the people I am attracted to.
After going black with Guy #51, I didn’t have sex with another black Guy until Guy #167 came along. I didn’t consciously avoid having sex with black people. It just never happened again, nor did I pursue it as avidly as that one time with Guy #51.
I don’t understand why it would be racist to have a sexual taste in race, but I also don’t get what exactly turns me on and off, and how much of my inner workings are of a benign origin.
I do understand never to rule anyone out on a dating profile.
Relationship summary:
LENGTH: 3 hours
FORMAT: Sex date
SEX SCORE (0 = The Hindenburg disaster <–> 10 = The best sex ever): 7.5
I think there can be hot guys of any “race, color, or creed.” I don’t think I’d ever go for a redhead, though. Maybe cause there’s so many gingers in my family. Who knows?
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Could be. For a long time I wasn’t into white guys either, maybe because I come from a family of blue eyed blonde people…
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I personally believe there is something inbuilt in us to find a certain type attractive, I have tried different men, but my ex husband, an ex boyfriend and my current partner have all been tall, slightly, tanned and dark haired, very different personalities but the looks are the same, if they didn’t turn me on then the relationships wouldn’t of worked for very long.
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Funny, I get the feeling I’m born with my preferences as well, though I find them to be rather fluid over time. (I used to stay away from most white guys. These days not so much;))
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We are complex creatures with many factors influencing how we are wired and what attracts us. You have made some very interesting and thoughtful journeys with others. I like to think of these as little serendipities, sometimes they last a long time, sometimes not so much. The important thing is to be open, to experience, to learn, and to share these loving moments with others who are open to us as well. Most likely we won’t change our wiring, and that’s OK. We probably will never fully understand why we are attracted to go on these various journeys with others – at least it keeps life interesting! That’s a good thing.
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‘Serendipities’ are the perfect word to describe dates like these. (Sex) dates are a perfect way to meet people you otherwise wouldn’t have crossed paths withs, people with wholly different backgrounds and lifestyles than your own…and sometimes even people who could help you get away with murder;)
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